How many times do we march through life without noticing
all the blessings that surround us? Sometimes we go days
and weeks without thinking, even for a moment, about all
the wonderful, amazing parts of our lives.
On the other hand, we certainly seem to have no problem
noticing all of the problems and disappointments that
surround us. And we remember each and every one of these
problems in excruciating detail. Our problems are rarely
overlooked or forgotten.
But, noticing all of the beautiful and wonderful parts of
our lives is something that we tend to forget. How
interesting...
We are livid about the long line at the grocery store. We
rant and rave that we can't find a parking place. And those
stupid drivers that pull out right in front of us...the
blood begins to boil just thinking about it! Sometimes it
seems like we're cursed. And complaining is the only thing
to do. In fact, there's probably nothing that we do better.
But, what about all the blessings in our lives? Why don't
we ever take the time to truly notice all of the small joys
in our day?
We have gotten into bad habits. We have conditioned our
minds to notice all the problems that we face. And we have
conditioned our minds to simply take for granted the
blessings and small satisfactions in our lives. And like
most habits, this one can be broken. There are concrete
ways to bring more gratitude into your life. And even
better, as you bring more gratitude into your life, you
will notice that there are indeed countless blessings all
around you.
There was an amazing study conducted by Emmons and
McCollough on gratitude. They essentially proved that
gratitude can be learned. They had a control group write
down simple things that they were grateful for every single
day for three weeks.
The results were astounding! Of course everyone in the
study felt a deeper sense of gratefulness for all that was
in their lives. But, there were so many other, wonderful
side effects from this experiment. Each person in the study
noticed an increase in the following areas of their life:
- Optimism
- Achievement of goals
- Alertness
- Enthusiasm
- Contentment
- Better sleep
Each person in the study noticed a decrease in these
following areas of their life:
- Sadness
- Anger
- Bitterness
- Jealousy
- Lethargy
- Boredom
This study made two important discoveries. First of all,
the whole area of gratitude can be learned. It is not just
something that you are born with. It is not just something
that you either have or you don't. You can easily learn to
add gratitude to your life.
Another important discovery is that gratitude produces so
many additional positive results in your life. The effects
of adding a grateful attitude to your life will multiply
your happiness tenfold!
Most importantly, gratitude will change your outlook on
life. Instead of focusing on the negative parts of your
life, you will begin to retrain your mind. Dwelling on
gratitude will begin to literally reverse your thinking.
Instead of simply noticing the rude driver that cut you
off, you will focus on the beautiful, sunny day. And
instead of fuming that there isn't a close parking place,
you will enjoy a brisk walk into the store. And you may
even exchange a friendly "hello" with someone on your way.
The point is that you will soon feel the benefits of
noticing all of the beauty that is constantly a part of
your life when gratitude is embedded in your thinking.
Of course, at first you will have to remind yourself
constantly to focus on the positives. But, after a while,
it will become second nature.
The easiest and most powerful way to add a sense of
gratitude to your life is to invest in a journal. (You can
buy your own, or simply use a spiral notebook.) You will
develop the habit of using 5 minutes every evening to
reflect on your blessings.
As I said before, this may not come easy at first. When you
start mentally reviewing your day you may instinctively
focus on the negative parts. You may only remember the
spilled cup of coffee, the fight with your son and the
traffic jam on the way home from work. But think! Think
deeper. There were small blessings in your day. No question
about it.
If you look at the last page of this course, you will
notice that I have compiled a list of things that I am
grateful for from my own gratitude journal. You will notice
that most of my items are small pleasures. I often feel
grateful for the quick kiss from my daughter when she
leaves for school.
After three weeks of consciously noticing the blessings
that surround you, your life will change. You will not look
at the world the same anymore. You will suddenly begin to
focus on the small parts of your life that you appreciate.
You will smile more. You will have a lighter heart. It's an
amazing process that you must try for yourself. You will
not believe the transformation in your life.
Gratitude is not something that just magically appears into
our lives. It is something that needs to be practiced a bit
each day. Only then will gratitude begin to appear in our
hearts.
About 10 years ago, my mom bought me a journal for my
birthday. When I opened it up, it was a gratitude journal
that had 5 lines for every day of the year. I was supposed
to write 5 things that I was grateful for every day. I had
not yet read research on the power of a grateful heart, but
I was willing to give it a try.
Like most people I plowed through my life without much
concern for all the constant blessings that surrounded me.
But, I didn't seem to have much of a problem noticing all
of the rough edges in my life. I noticed the pile of bills
that needed to be paid, the car that needed to get into the
shop, and the laundry that never seemed to get done. There
was never a lack of problems for me to focus on. Now,
don't get me wrong, there were times that I was grateful:
the birth of my children, a wonderful new job, a special
night with a friend...but, these experiences were far and
few between. They only happened every few months. So aside
from my special events, I really took little notice of the
other blessings in my life.
I remember the first time that I sat down to write in my
gratitude journal. I sat and sat and tried to think of some
big event that had happened to me that day. Nothing came to
mind. Then I started worrying that I couldn't think of
anything to write down. I couldn't even think of one thing.
How was I going to think of five?
So, I actually put it away for a few days. Meanwhile, I
would occasionally think about that journal. I would think
about what I could possibly write down. The next time that
I took it out I wrote down five things: my children, my
husband, my parents, my sisters and my friends. Good for me!
The next day, I wrote down the same five things. Obviously,
there was a shortage in my creative thinking at the moment.
I thought to myself that this seemed kind of pointless to
just write the same thing every day. But, what else was I
grateful for?
And then it clicked. I suddenly remembered the feeling that
I had that same morning as I sat down on my living room
couch with a good book and a cup of coffee. I was grateful
for those fifteen minutes of reading and coffee. And
suddenly, so much began to flood into my mind. I was
grateful for the ten minutes that I cuddled with my dog. I
was grateful for the sunny day. I was grateful as I looked
at my beautiful garden.
After a few days, writing down my five areas of gratitude
became second nature. And yes, after a few weeks, my life
did change. Instead of rushing through life without notice,
I began to actually see all of the beauty around me. Sure,
I was still annoyed by my pile of bills, the broken car,
and the unending laundry. But, I began to notice the small
blessings. I noticed how much abundance was really in my
life. And I developed a grateful heart.
Your life will also change as you put aside your problems
and focus on your blessings.
----------------------------------------------------
Jessica Swanson is an extremely successful entrepreneur ,
marketer and life coach who has achieved a high six-figure
income. She has mentored hundreds of others on how to
achieve the same results. You can visit her at
http://www.JessicaSwanson.com
No comments:
Post a Comment